Things seem to work on their own timeline in Peru, however hard you want to make things happen on your schedule, however much you plan and prepare and tell everyone what you want, it doesn’t seem to make much of a difference. Peru has its own ideas about how things work, and they don’t always line up with the rest of the world and your own grand plans. I had an inkling of this, which is why I wanted to go there to oversee production in person – just to make sure. My suspicions were correct and I am so glad I was there in person to check on things and hustle things along.
The timing thing can be really frustrating. Things just don’t happen in the same way they do in the USA and England, but as I settled into my time there I let go of that nagging feeling of always needing to be productive. The feeling that life was somehow slipping away from me if I wasn’t always on schedule, efficient and using every minute for pushing forward. Actually nothing really changed except finding a well of possibility in those times; maybe I don’t have to be stressed out, working non-stop and afraid to stand still, but can instead find space in the extra moments of waiting. I noticed how conditioned I have been to be busy busy, and to be not busy meant I had to push through a few walls of fear; that my life would crumble before me if I wasn’t holding everything together. To come out on the other side of finding more trust in life and a balance that works for me is still a work in progress but I have been able to step off the hamster wheel of western life for a moment and find so much peace on the other side, as well as exploring where my boundaries lie, and how I can define them for myself a little bit more.
I found Peru to be an incredibly spiritual place, the natural connection with the earth, the sky, the food and each other is so much more ingrained into their way of being. Care for Pachamama comes so much more naturally there, and there is a reverence for nature and all SHE does for us that I could tangibly feel. I kept getting this line come to me in various forms: ‘what is modern is also ancient’. The indigenous cultures all over the world know how to work with and care for Mother Earth, and I feel that it is imperative that we protect their knowledge and way of life. This is another reason I feel so strongly about the work I do, to keep mothers - and fathers - able to be in the home or on the land with their families and close to the earth, protects that incredibly valuable knowledge that we will all need in the years to come. To give them more of a chance of staying in that way of life without having to move to a city and get a ‘job’ gives us all a better chance of survival in the future, wherever in the world that is.
There are so many more things I got from my time there too. Beautiful experiences, people, food, connections, days that formed into new friends and unexpected adventure. Ultimately what I feel like I have returned with is renewed perspective. The ability to be more detached and see things as they are – see the worlds that we all come from and how they shape us. See who I am and what has shaped me. Landing back in LA from Peru was a shock – the jarring noise, traffic, pollution, disconnection, I vowed instantly I could never live in a big city again! (we will see), and then onto Dallas, New York, London and finally my family home back in the peace of the peak district (in the north of England) – thank goodness!
So grateful for this time to re-charge and the ability to spend time in my family home, which I once saw as so boring has now turned into a place of peace and refuge.
I have seen and experienced that there are infinite ways to live. Spending a lot of time in one place can sometimes feel like options are slim, and how to do life has a straightforward trajectory, but life can be so much more wide open and full of possibilities – whether you decide to travel the world, or just change your perspective from right where you are. To push through a wall of fear and see what is on the other side.
It is all possible.